Passed Over Pets
AVAILABLE SERVICES / ORDER HERE
(NOTE: All payment links have been removed from the site.)
I offer Owner-Animal Consultations for Passed Over Pets, and a special Service for pets whose Passing Over is imminent (from upcoming euthanasia, injury, ailing, etc.) with an accompanying "Post-" Consultation for Communication, Relief and Closure.
I also have an additional Transition Service to assist with getting your pet back to you as another pet, if this is what is decided all around.
Pay for the Consultation using the PayPal payment link (below).
Fill out the Order Form (below) to order your Pet Consultation, and send a separate email describing all that you would like covered. Attach a picture of the animal to that email if possible.
I will contact you to let you know that all is received. You and I then just need to coordinate our schedule for the Consultation.
NOTES About How To Order:
Clarification of the type of info needed in the Form / your "Info" email
Email me with the needed details (as described below), attaching a picture of your pet to that email if possible.
Tell me about:
Your relationship to the animal (owner, neighbor, your sister's dog, it's the bird who comes by every morning to use the bird feeder, etc.)
Were you the original owner? How old were they went you got them?
Type of animal (dog, cat, bird, lizard) + breed / type (Great Dane, Gopher Snake, Siamese Cat, Ferret, etc.)
Spayed/neutered? Had babies before? (If known)
Any other pets in the home? How did they get along?
Who interacted with the animal besides you on a regular basis? (spouse, best friend, significant other, weekly apartment cleaning person, your kid's best friend, etc.)
Description of average living environment of animal (hung out in the house a lot; zoo animal; neighborhood tomcat; lived by a lake but wouldn't go near it; lots of fresh air; cooped up; etc.)
Any physical peculiarities or abnormalities such as missing a limb, Diabetes, Hip Dysplasia, etc. (regardless of whether contributed to their death), or injuries, accidents, surgeries, severe traumas, etc.
Regarding passing over:
Details relevant to the passing over (how, why, events or health matters that led up to it.)
Was it euthanasia?
Was the cause of death actually known? What did the vet say (if not)? Autopsy?
Were there final good-byes?
Who took them to the vet? Was "in the room"? / similar
What was done with your pet's body?
Any other details that are likely relevant?
If missing for a long time and you figure they're long since passed over, would you like verification if possible from them, and what they're "up to" now?
If this is for imminent Euthanasia and Planning: Preparatory conversation for their requests, questions, messages, possible fears, etc.and your chance to know of and respond to same
What would you like me to say? Find out? (Remember you will be involved at the time as well, but I'm just asking this now to assist you in putting your thoughts together beforehand.)
The Consultation will include as well basic discussions which naturally arise (things they bring up with me that they want me to know or tell you, general "How are you?", etc.)
I will contact you after reviewing your email, and if I need anything clarified before starting, I will let you know. Remember, the more details I have to start with, the more "angles" I have with which to "dig", to approach subjects and concerns with, etc.
We're actually dealing with a living being here. Communication is KEY.
A. HOW TO USE MY OVER-THE-PHONE SERVICE
(Already) Passed Over Consultation OVER THE PHONE: $90 for up to one hour
Simply pay (link below), email me with the details (and a picture of the animal if possible), and I will email you to confirm a time for the call.
Payment Link Here
Additional hours are $60/hr. Use this link for Additional Hours and/or for subsequent Follow-Ups.
B. PASSING OVER Preparatory AND Post Consultation $125
This service is twofold: before-the-fact Preparatory discussion and agreements made between you and your pet, and my consulting the pet after-the-fact to let them say what they feel they need to, as well as letting you know how they are and what they are up to.
"It's funny, after I cried myself to sleep after waking up I feel fine about the whole thing.
Other than looking for her on my bed when I walk in my room expecting her to be there, it hasn't been a huge adjustment. I mean I miss her as much as possible but I had time to prepare for this and it helped so much to be able to talk to her right after." ~ MM
"I knew he was clearly letting me know he was understanding the need for the conversation and validating that he was indeed telling Julie some key points to let me know he was there and participating. Julie kept us both at ease as we worked through the questions and the future plans. I was pleased with his wishes at this point, I will check back in the future to see if he has any changes. I no longer feel devastated thinking about the future we can work through it together." DC
Preparatory encompasses a Consultation which can and should cover any variations of the following (your questions and/or I will address as needed):
Euthanasia and Natural Death
They know this is coming. They don't know this is coming. They suspect this is coming. You have been considering/discussing it. What do they think it means? Their choice (or not) in the matter. What questions they have about it. Their fears. Your emotions, thoughts etc which you wish to pass along at this point in time. What plans or goals do they have? Or not...or would like to discuss. What details do they wish to pass along (bring this blanket, that person, one last walk around the yard, please cremate/don't cremate the body etc.
Your initial input should include your ideas and feelings about their suffering and so on as applicable. If you feel guilty in advance, tell them. Tell them everything you want to say. Let them know. Let them help you. Soothe you.
I need to pass something along here which is tricky to say, so bear with me. I've found the following from experience with already passed over pets. The owner contacts me to help them reconnect. Besides the obvious other trauma and loss involved, one very common source of great upset for the owner has been the struggle they went through about when to euthanise the pet - should they have let them hang on? When was the right time? They were never sure.
These are owners who had already decided to do it. They had consulted the vet, done what they could, whatever the circumstances. It was not a matter of if, only when. Since no one can predict the exact time of a natural death, they felt that they perhaps or surely must have "killed their pet prematurely". Conceptually, they had come to terms with euthanasia as best they could, but this one angle always haunted them.
I am NOT stating any opinion whatsoever about euthanasia. I am only pointing out what has come up. The following is the best I can offer to help this tragic dilemma:
The Preparatory aspect of my service gives you the opportunity to consult with your pet before the fact. See what they have to say about it.
You might say, the animal doesn't know their time of death either, so how can I go by what they say? It might be tomorrow, next week or maybe they can hang in there for a month. Well, you're already going by what the vet says, what you think, what others have said, aren't you? Give the animal being themself the chance to speak for themself.
Let's face facts: if it's inevitable, and you know it's inevitable, and you are going to euthanise your pet, then chances are excellent you are going to feel bad about it whenever it occurs so at least you can rest assured that you let them offer their ideas about the time concept. It's a small offering but can make a huge difference in easing your mind and your pet's as well. They follow your lead a bit on the emotions of the matter. Often the pet is nowhere near as upset as the owner, and is very rattled by the owner being upset. Just a fact.
Generally, a pet's requests can be carried out to the letter; and obviously being able to follow through is facilitated by contacting them in advance of the passing. Sometimes the wishes and requests are not as easy to fulfill, due to circumstances (such as they say they really want the torn blanket they recall from puppyhood to be buried with them, but the owner threw it away 5 years earlier, type of thing) or logistics (other people's schedules, or the like).
Please note that quite often pet owners mention that they are planning on keeping their pet(s)' ashes for when they themselves die and they're going to "all be buried together". I understand this desire and sentiment and don't disasgree but at the time I'm being told, generally it's part of the Consult and even if not, the pet picks up on this. You should note that this, as well as your or their desire to be "buried outside" (with or without a casket) both are subject to variances such as legalities. I don't "care" one way or the other (so to speak) but I'm quite adverse to telling a pet something that I know is not true or cannot happen, and I'm never sure what you (or they) say along those lines can happen unless we address it. If it's iffy, we need to tell them.
Example: Rover wants to be buried in your back yard. Ordinaces / laws prevent this, or, you're planning on moving in a year and want to bring his remains with you, or you're planning on moving in a year and it's fine to leave him buried there but you feel he should know this in case it matters to him, to be "left" there.
Example: You're going to have your cats' ashes buried with you / mixed with yours when you die. Okay, let's examine this. Sometime, hopefully waaaay up the line, 20, 30, 40, 50 years hence, you die. Who at that time knows about these wishes? Your family, if they are themselves still alive, let's say, go through your things and find the kitties' ashes. They do whatever they do with them. Perhaps they, knowing your love for the kitties, scatter them along with yours by your favorite beach. Okay... but that's not what you originally said. Or you left instructions that you want your ashes mixed in with your dog's. Folks have mentioned this. Ok, but your heirs or the Executor of your estate or the lawyer or whoever read that and go, Oh, well, that's nice but Eternal Peace Funeral Home does not allow for that as it's illegal. You and no one may not care at that time, but... we don't know that here and now when doing the Consult, so if you're thinking along those lines, you need to do whatever you need to do to research this and plan appropriately. You could fit your wishes into your Estate planning, write it in your Will etc., and what you request may still for some reason not be allowed to be honored. I have no idea about your local laws, where you're going to be living and dying, when, who's going to be around to tend to things - and neither do your pets.
The only point is, express your wishes but try to have your homework done if these wishes are quite important to you so that we can tell the pet how we think it might actually go. It's totally fine to tell them what you have in mind and see what they think. They may not care, they may think it's sweet, or fitting, they may not agree with it in the first place, etc. but as with any "kid", the most important thing is that even when expressed, these plans should be presented as probable or desired and not "in stone" necessarily.
This last part may not be that important to some readers, but it is important to others. so I felt I should write a bit about it.
In a similar vein, you may be interested in this article from the Humane Society: Free Kit: Providing for Your Pet's Future Without You. This does not have to do with Passed Over Pets but rather if you die first, but often this comes to mind while reading about the reverse so I have included it for reference.
To recap, I have found that owners basically always do as much as they can to fulfill their pet's wishes on the subject. Sometimes, however, the pet takes a turn for the worse and one can only do what one can do. I want to point out - and this is a very important point, that when one cannot follow through on this or that point, but wanted to, tried to, had to re-prioritize, etc., just the Consultation itself, the communication they had already had with the animal being, takes care of a very large part of the emotional aspects of it all for the animal. Know this: If you can't do every single thing they asked, it has been my experience that they do not get upset, since they know you heard them, and they know you tried. Do not underestimate the power of having gone over things with them in advance. Animals are just as perceptive as we, often more: they know you, and they know your intentions. They pick up on what's lip service and what's "for real", and when an owner hears that Rover wants you to take his torn gray raggy toy to the vet, or that Fifi does not wish to be cremated, or Uncle Bob has to come in the car so Riley can have him around in the final time but Uncle Bob is not to be in the room, only Mommy, or whatever it is, they know you're going to try to follow what they said. Even then, pets know certain things can suddenly take precedence such as if they take a turn for the worse.
So like I said, generally, a pet's requests can be carried out to the letter; and obviously being able to follow through is facilitated by contacting them in advance of the passing. In this Testimonial, the owner did do just that, and despite her not being able to follow through on all of the arrangements, the fact of having done the Consult beforehand made a huge difference in peace of mind.
It's always worth a shot, and the main thing is that you did talk with them and things are established between you and your pet, which sets the tone for all future occurences.
Depending on Your Pet's Health and Circumstances...if at all possible:
As soon as possible following the Preparatory Consultation, please take the time to spend some "fun and familiar" time with your pet. You will wish to spend a lot of time holding them sharing emotions, and the like. Well, make sure you also mix in some fun play time, outdoors time, games and the like. They need to be distracted, to extrovert, get some fresh air and space, and to be completely blunt, they are not dead yet. Help them rejoice in day-to-day life!
Post (after-the-fact) Consultation Included in the service, this is where I contact your pet and let them, well, talk. They tell us how it went. What it was like for them. Their fears or joys. What they found it to be like once it really happened. Any new or residual trauma or upsets they may wish to now get off their chest and be free from. Messages to you. Their plans, or what may have changed with their plans or ideas, so this can be discussed or known. The rest of the Pre- and Post- Consult service includes an hour of this after-the-fact time. (If need be, further $60/hr hourly rates will apply.)
Testimonial from someone who used Aunt Julie's Pre- and Post- service.
Payment Link Here
C. TRANSITIONAL SERVICE $60/hr
Sometimes your pet would like to come back to your household as another pet after they pass on. This comes up during the Preparatory Consultation, the Post-Passing Consultation or during a re-connecting done even years later. If this is what you want and it is agreed all around, there are a few factors which must be handled "just so". The factors vary from household to household but the basics are the same. There is more detailed information on Transitions on my FAQs page, but if this circumstance applies to you, this service is available above and beyond the above-named services.
This service generally does not take more than the minimum hour, but I mention the hourly rate just in case.
Payment Link here.
D. FOLLOW-UP SERVICE (and Hourly rates) $60/hr
A Follow-Up for a Passed Over pet is rare, but it does happen. Sometimes you want to check in with them again and see what they're up to. This is available to you and there's no reason why not! Use this link as it's pre-set for $60/hr increments. Use it as well for add-on hours, that is, you do an Initial Consultation for $90 and it goes two hours instead of one. You would have paid the $90 already; you use this link, here, to add on the additional $60 for that second hour.
HOW TO SEND A PICTURE VIA EMAIL
You can and should email a picture. Insert it in or attach it to an email. It should be either an internet-viewable picture (.jpeg or .gif format), or a .tif if this is what you have, as I can view .tifs using other software. Send to: email@example.com (and of course reference who you are and so on). This is helpful as I have found it to be just as true for animals as it is for humans that one's body is a very, very important part of one's "self-identification" so it makes the transmit of ideas (from them to me) much more honed from their end if they detect that I "identify" them fully, that is, see or otherwise detect their physical form. I don't know how else to explain it - it's just that way. (Plus most of them love that I can see what they looked like - they're very proud and self-conscious, just as we are, so my having their picture to hand is a great ice breaker.)
READY TO START?
Here's all you do:
1. Select and pay for desired service. Payment via the Internet is done via PayPal. PayPal emails me as soon as payment is received by them. (If you're not already signed up with them, you would do so at this time. If you have a problem with "cookies" call them - they'll help you sort it out fast.)
2. Fill out the following form and click on "Send" (it's a little off to the right side, below the Form). Separately email me with all the details (as covered above) and a picture, and I'll take it from there.
3. Once you send the Form, there's an acknowledgement page with a "Back" link. When you click on it, it takes you back to this page. (Don't click on "Send" again or it'll just send the same thing again - click on Reset and it clears the Form and that's that!)
"Aunt" Julie Passed Over Pet Consultation Order Form
One Order Form and Payment per pet. If more than one pet, information and pictures can be combined as needed.
A) Order Form ~ It has been a simple "Input the info and click 'Send' " type of form but I no longer have the computer service I used to use to process the form and am currently looking for another service. For now, just you can just type the info into an email; utilize copy/paste if you know how and are so inclined.
Quick notes regarding the Order Form:
1. There's a part where I ask for the email address. Please take into account the following: Generally when I receive an mail I just hit "Reply" and the way my AOL software works, my new email goes back whence it came (to the originating email address - i.e. the one you wrote me from). Whatever one I get is the one I'll enter into my AOL "address book" and when I go to write to you, on my own (not as a "reply") then, or soon after, or someday, it'll be the one that plugs into an email. If there's something I need to know about your email addresses, do let me know. That is, once in awhile a person has, for example, an email address at work which they cannot access at home, then they email me from work, forget to mention this or that this applies to just that one email sent, they go home, I've email them back but they don't "get" my response and it messes up scheduling or something like that. So if the email address you put on the Order Form is different than the one we have been using if already emailing back and forth, take a quick minute to drop me a line and explain things so I know what's up.
2. I DO need backup phone numbers just in case. If we're going to talk at your home, give me your cell number just in case. I may need to get ahold of you 2 hours before to change something in a pinch...and not be able to reach you. Whatever - there have been numerous quirky unpredicted circumstances where this has been needed and of course I can't think of the examples but each time, the person was very appreciative of being contacted and glad they'd given me that number, so please just provide the info as a just-in-case.
3. No, your info's nobody's business just as someone else's isn't your business. So don't worry about my giving out or selling my info about any of you. And if you're interested in acquiring it....don't ask.
First and Last Name:
Address Line 1:
Address Line 2 (as applicable):
Phone Hm and Time Zone:
Your Relationship to Pet (e.g. "owner" "Mommy" etc.)
When are you available for the Consultation:
How Did You Hear Of Aunt Julie's Services:
Pet Age Type (Species Breed) Gender:
Date of Passing and their age at that time:
Passed Over Consult or Pre and Post Consult:
(Re: "mailing list", I don't really send much out at this time. All that refers to is that on occasion I'll send out an email of interest postcard if I happen to have a "special" going, but this has been running only at a couple-few times a year.)
Consultations are always scheduled in with an "as soon as possible" basis.
A lot of Consultations are performed the same day as paid/ordered or the very next day. The average is about 3 days. I try to do them as fast as I can!
Phone consults of course must be coordinated with our mutual schedules.
I look forward to hearing from you about your pet or the animal you wish to reconnect with. We will get those questions answered and those issues resolved, and you will know what happened, is happening, and what can now happen with your pet.
"Thanks to you Julie, I am now at peace, relaxed and happy. (Of course I will always want her back,
but in a way you did give her back to me)." ~ SP
Still not sure? Feel free to browse the Testimonials and the rest of this site, and see if you think I offer what you need. And please feel free to contact me with any concerns or questions at firstname.lastname@example.org.
|See also Testimonial Tidbits on my Home Page as well as sprinkled throughout the site. All are REAL Statements from Clients!
THANK YOU for your referrals! I offer something others do not: Refer a new person to my site who uses my services and you earn Consultation time with Aunt Julie!
Here's how it works:
You earn ONE FREE Consultation ("Comm") Hour for your animal! One referral, one Hour. Two = two hours. Etc.
You can use these for a new pet or a pet we've talked to before, a whole room of pets we've talked to before - whoever!
If you've already got some unused time "on account", this adds to it.
It's got no "cash value" but it IS Consult time value, if you choose to use it.
You CAN gift it out or donate it to someone else for their use, if you'd like. Or save it for when you most or suddenly need it or when it's just... time to talk to 'em.
Everyone wins! You can save money (and you're probably already mentioning your Aunt Julie experiences here and there anyway), I meet new folks and their bay-bees and "business-wise", I get new clientele, and best of all, more animals get to be heard!
NOTES NOTES NOTES!
(1) This does not include if you buy someone a Consultation or Gift Certificate as a present, gift out your money or "time" on account to them, re-giftor your own Gift Certificate to them (all of which are fine but again, do not then earn you a referral credit, even if your person is "new" for Aunt Julie). And no, it does not apply to every future Consult your referral does. YES, a couple of folks actually asked me that. It's just that first one your referral actually pays for.
(2) The credit comes when your referral actually pays to do the Consult, not when you refer them, not when you tell me you've referred them, not when they first contact me to inquire or even to schedule, not when they've sent me info or scheduled. When they pay, you get your referral credit. This is because folks DO do a lot of referring and talking up the incredible experiences and adventures they have talking with their pets with Aunt Julie and their friends may act or even truly be interested, but life, a social "face" and/or other factors every so often prevent them from following through. It's gone as far as a person (referred or out of the blue) contacts me,we correspond, they're all excited and send me all the info and pix and Order Form and scheduling info and then I never hear from them again no matter what. Odd but true! I've spent all that time and caring and effort and ?? So in the case of a referral, I love 'em! but they do need to actually DO it for the referring person to get the Referral Credit.
(3) Last but not least, to my old salts: NO, you haven't lost your mind. My referral system used to be slightly different. One referral credit got you one Follow-Up hour and it took two referrals to add up to one Initial Consult. Things got a bit confusing so now it's just one for one.
Share the experience with a "Gift Certificate"!
You can purchase Consultations for another on the site as well Just pay for a Consult and email me with the info as who will be using it. Let me know how to proceed (I email them directly, or it's a Surprise and you will info them, etc.)
All site contents Copyright (c) 2002, 2009 Julie Rich.